Thursday, August 21, 2025

Does blood sugar tracking help non-diabetics?

Does blood sugar tracking help non-diabetics?

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Understanding Blood Sugar and Its Impact on Health

Blood sugar, or glucose, is the primary source of energy for the body. It comes from the carbohydrates we consume, which are broken down by the digestive system and absorbed into the bloodstream. Once in the blood, glucose is transported to cells where it is used for energy or stored. This process is regulated by insulin, a hormone produced by the pancreas. Insulin helps cells absorb glucose, ensuring that blood sugar levels remain stable.

For people with diabetes, monitoring blood sugar is crucial because their bodies either don't produce enough insulin or can't use it effectively. This leads to high blood sugar levels, which can cause serious health complications over time. However, the question remains: Is blood sugar monitoring beneficial for non-diabetics?

What is Blood Sugar?

Glucose is essential for energy metabolism. As Dr. Brigitte Bäuerlein, a nutritional scientist, explains, "It's our currency in energy metabolism." Blood sugar levels are measured in milligrams per deciliter (mg/dL) and typically rise after eating, especially after consuming foods high in simple sugars or refined carbohydrates. In healthy individuals, these levels return to normal within a few hours. But in diabetics, this balance is disrupted due to issues with insulin production or function.

Stress can also affect blood sugar levels. When the body is under stress, such as during a hectic day in a busy city, the liver releases glucose into the bloodstream as part of the "fight or flight" response. This can lead to temporary spikes in blood sugar.

Methods of Testing Blood Sugar

There are several ways to monitor blood sugar levels. The most common method involves a blood glucose meter, which requires a small drop of blood obtained through a finger prick. Another method is the hemoglobin A1c (HbA1c) test, which provides an average of blood sugar levels over the past two to three months. This test is often used by medical professionals to diagnose diabetes.

A more advanced option is the continuous glucose monitor (CGM), which uses a sensor placed under the skin to measure glucose levels in the interstitial fluid. These devices provide real-time data and can be connected to a smartphone or receiver. While CGMs offer convenience, they require proper training and may not be cost-effective for non-diabetics.

What is a Glucose Spike?

A glucose spike occurs when there is a sharp increase in blood sugar levels, usually after consuming foods high in simple carbohydrates. These spikes can lead to intense cravings for sugary or processed foods, creating a cycle of highs and lows. When the body releases too much insulin to manage the spike, blood sugar levels can drop rapidly, resulting in a "crash" that leaves you feeling hungry and fatigued.

Can Non-Diabetics Benefit from Monitoring?

According to Bernhard Kulzer, head of the research institute at the Bad Mergentheim Diabetes Academy, non-diabetics generally do not need to monitor their blood sugar levels. The body naturally regulates glucose through the release of insulin and glucagon, hormones that help maintain balance. However, there are exceptions.

Endurance athletes may benefit from monitoring their blood sugar to avoid "hitting the wall," a state of sudden energy depletion caused by low glycogen stores. For individuals with a family history of diabetes, checking blood sugar levels for a short period can help understand how certain foods affect their body. However, long-term monitoring is not necessary unless there is a specific medical reason.

Pros and Cons of Monitoring Blood Sugar

Monitoring blood sugar can provide valuable biofeedback, helping individuals understand how their diet and lifestyle choices affect their body. This information can be useful for making informed decisions about nutrition and exercise. However, interpreting the results requires knowledge and guidance. Without proper understanding, the data may not be meaningful.

Kulzer advises against constant monitoring for healthy individuals, noting that it can be costly and unnecessary. Bäuerlein warns that obsessing over every meal could lead to compulsive behaviors, particularly around food choices.

Blood Sugar and Weight Loss

While stable blood sugar levels can contribute to better overall health, they are not the sole factor in weight loss. According to Bäuerlein, individual responses to sugar vary based on factors like age, muscle mass, and activity level. Kulzer emphasizes that calorie intake is the key to losing weight. To shed pounds, one must consume fewer calories than their body burns through daily activities and metabolism.

Healthy Nutrition Practices

Maintaining a balanced diet is essential for preventing glucose spikes and reducing cravings. This includes eating plenty of fruits, vegetables, fiber, and lean proteins while limiting empty carbs and added sugars. Avoiding sugary drinks and snacks, such as soft drinks, juices, and smoothies, can help reprogram food preferences over time.

Starting meals with a salad or vegetables can slow the absorption of glucose into the bloodstream, helping to maintain more stable blood sugar levels throughout the day. Making mindful food choices and staying informed about nutrition can lead to long-term health benefits for everyone, regardless of whether they have diabetes or not.

8 Hidden Heat Stroke Warning Signs Doctors Can't Ignore

8 Hidden Heat Stroke Warning Signs Doctors Can't Ignore

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Understanding Heat Stroke: Causes, Symptoms, and Immediate Actions

There are few things that feel better than a brisk walk outside on a warm, sunny day. However, if you're working hard in sweltering temperatures, you may be putting yourself at risk for heat stroke. While it does take time for heat exhaustion to develop into heat stroke, knowing the possible heat stroke symptoms can be the difference between staying safe and healthy and putting your body in a dangerous position.

Heat exhaustion and heat stroke are similar but have some key differences. Heat exhaustion comes down to a couple of factors: exposure to uncomfortably high temperatures over several days and a lack of fluids. This can lead to lots of sweating, rapid breathing, and a fast but weak pulse.

Types of Heat Stroke

There are two forms of heat stroke, explained by J. Luke Pryor, Ph.D., A.T.C., C.S.C.S., a kinesiologist and researcher in the Hydration, Exercise, and Thermoregulation Laboratory in the Department of Exercise and Nutrition Sciences at the University of Buffalo.

Classic Heat Stroke

Classic heat stroke generally comes on gradually and affects very young and elderly people who have trouble maintaining their core body temperature. People who don’t have a way of cooling down—say, folks who live in a building without air conditioning during a heat wave—are also at risk of classic heat stroke. In these instances, the person may not realize they’ve become hot because their body temperature is steadily rising over many hours or days.

Exertional Heat Stroke

Exertional heat stroke is more sudden and occurs in people who are active in high temperatures. In fact, heat-related illness can come on within hours on particularly hot and humid days. It can affect anyone exercising in the heat, but those who are doing strenuous activity—such as endurance athletes (like runners and soccer players), football players (who sweat it out in stifling equipment), and laborers (like construction workers)—face the highest risk.

“When we begin to exercise, we produce an incredible amount of heat,” Pryor explained. Typically, our sweat cools us down, but with exertional heat stroke, that doesn’t happen. When your organs overheat (which can occur during outdoor workouts on sweltering days) your body’s temperature-control center can malfunction.

So in turn, your internal temperature rises—and when it reaches 104 or 105°F, that’s when things start to get really dangerous. When you get that hot, the cells inside of your intestines get damaged, which can leak toxic substances into your blood and cause multiple organs to fail, Pryor said.

8 Heat Stroke Symptoms to Look For

How do you know if you're dealing with heat stroke? Experiencing one or more of these signs means it's time to take action.

  1. High Body Temperature
    If your body temperature hits 104°F or higher, you could be dealing with heat stroke. If you take someone’s temperature and it’s lower than that—but they still exhibit other heat stroke symptoms or feel that something is wrong—you should still do what you can to cool them down and get medical help.

  2. Muscle Cramps
    Also known as heat cramps, muscle cramps can be one of the earliest symptoms of heat-related illness during exercise. You may experience painful spasms—particularly in your legs, arms, or abdomen—when you sweat it out in high heat.

  3. A Lack of Sweat—or an Abundance of It
    When you spend a long time in extreme heat, your body stops trying to maintain its core internal temperature. So during traditional heat stroke, you may actually stop sweating. However, you’ll probably start sweating like crazy if you’re experiencing exertional heat stroke.

  4. Confusion or Trouble Walking
    Exertional heat stroke throws your central nervous system out of whack, so a lack of coordination, confusion, aggression, or the inability to walk are huge red flags.

  5. A Poundin Headache
    A throbbing headache is another common sign of heat stroke. This symptom is typically due to dehydration or the overall impact heat stroke has on the central nervous system.

  6. Dizziness, Nausea, or Vomiting
    As you continue to sweat, your body will become increasingly dehydrated. The heat will start to affect various organs, all of which can exacerbate any of the heat stroke symptoms on this list and can lead to dizziness, fainting, nausea, or vomiting.

  7. Skin Redness
    In instances of both traditional and exertional heat stroke, the body directs blood flow toward the skin as it tries to cool itself down, making it appear red.

  8. Elevated Heart Rate or Trouble Breathing
    Your heart is put under an immense amount of stress when you overheat. Why? It needs to pump harder and faster to make sure your body’s natural cooling systems are working to keep your temperature balanced.

What to Do If You Think Someone Has Heat Stroke

The best thing you can do is rapidly and aggressively cool the person down while you wait for help to arrive. Here are a few measures he said you can take:

  • Move the person to a cooler place. Get them out of the sun and into the shade or a cool room indoors.
  • Fill a tub with ice water and have the person soak for 15 to 20 minutes.
  • If a tub is not available, hose them down with cold water, pour a bottle of water over their body, or take them to a nearby lake, river, or anywhere with cool water.
  • Get them to drink water or a sports drink. This might be difficult if the person is extremely light-headed, confused, and irritable, so you might need to wait until they cool down before they can tolerate fluids.
New Study Reveals All States Fall Short in Supporting Immigrant Students

New Study Reveals All States Fall Short in Supporting Immigrant Students

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A National Crisis in Supporting Newcomer Students

An analysis by a progressive think tank has revealed that no state in the United States adequately supports newcomer students, including immigrants, refugees, and other vulnerable populations. The findings highlight a critical gap in how states define, track, and fund programs for these students, leaving many without the necessary resources to succeed in school.

The report, released by The Century Foundation and its offshoot Next 100, evaluated all 50 states and Washington, D.C., based on their policies and practices related to immigrant students. The results were alarming: none of the states received a grade higher than a C+, with 42 states scoring between a C- and D-, and five states—Alabama, Arkansas, Delaware, Montana, and West Virginia—earning an F.

This lack of support comes at a time when federal policies have increasingly targeted immigrant communities. Under the Trump administration, there have been reports of young people being arrested, detained, and even deported. Additionally, recent changes to federal rules have removed mandates for schools to accommodate English learners, further complicating the educational landscape for these students.

The Need for Better Data and Funding

The report emphasizes the importance of clear definitions for "newcomer" students, which include refugees, asylum seekers, unaccompanied minors, and migratory children. It also calls for better data collection and reporting on key indicators such as years in the U.S., English proficiency, home language, prior schooling, and academic outcomes.

State education agencies should use this data to inform funding formulas and create specific funding structures that supplement federal resources. This additional aid should focus on supporting students during their first few critical years in the public school system, with transparent reporting on how the funds are used and their impact.

However, the current data collection efforts across the country are inconsistent. Only four states have clear definitions for the term "newcomer" and consistently collect robust data about these children. In contrast, 17 states collect no discernable data on immigrant students at all, while 22 compile information solely for compliance with federal Title III funds aimed at English learners.

State-Level Examples of Effective Practices

Despite the overall poor performance, some states have implemented effective strategies. Oregon requires all districts to submit what it calls "Recent Arrivers" data, which is used for federal reporting and to allocate Title III funds. Kentucky collects disaggregated immigrant student data annually and divides it by subgroup, while Washington state tracks all eligible English learners in student information systems and reports key data points like birth country and U.S. school enrollment date.

North Dakota stands out as a model for transparency and accountability. The state publicly reports disaggregated English learner data by year, including counts and percentages of immigrant, refugee, and migrant students. This data is broken down by district, home language, and ethnicity, allowing for targeted interventions and a clearer understanding of the diverse needs within the student population.

Challenges and the Path Forward

The report highlights the challenges faced by young immigrants who often move between districts in search of stable housing. When programs differ across district lines, these highly mobile students may not qualify for comparable services, and their new schools may not receive the necessary resources to support them effectively.

The quality of education for newcomer students will not only affect their opportunities but also the health and well-being of their communities. As Alejandra Vázquez Baur, a co-author of the report, stated, "Newcomer students are in our classrooms regardless of what our president says. They are valuable neighbors and students. They become valuable leaders in their communities."

With anti-immigrant sentiment growing, it is crucial for states to take the lead in protecting the rights and needs of these students. By developing consistent definitions, collecting comprehensive data, and allocating appropriate funding, states can ensure that all students, regardless of background, have the opportunity to succeed.

Xi Hammers Home Message of Control Over Tibet in Rare Visit

Xi Hammers Home Message of Control Over Tibet in Rare Visit

Xi Hammers Home Message of Control Over Tibet in Rare Visit

(My Healthty Life) -- Chinese leader Xi Jinping called for his government to tighten its ethnic-assimilation campaign during a rare visit to Tibet, throwing a spotlight on a region that’s also been a source oftension with India even as the rivals improve ties. 

Xi made his second-ever visit to Tibet as president to mark the 60th anniversary of its founding as an autonomous region of China. While he didn’t speak at a ceremony Thursday in the provincial capital Lhasa, attended by some 20,000 people and televised to the nation, the state-run Xinhua News Agency reported that Xi told local officials maintaining political stability, social order, ethnic solidarity and religious harmony are key for Tibet’s development.

“It is necessary to actively create a national model zone for ethnic unity and progress,” Xi was cited as saying by Xinhua on Wednesday. In reference to Mandarin, he urged the popularization of the “national common language and script,” adding “we must guide Tibetan Buddhism to adapt to socialist society.”

His trip represents the first time a Chinese president has attended the ceremony to mark Tibet’s founding — an occasion usually frequented by lower-level officials — signaling Xi’s desire to further integrate ethnic groups under Communist Party control.

“It is very striking that Xi himself decided to attend what is in many ways a routine event,” said Robert Barnett, a professor at SOAS University of London. “The visit seems to suggest a serious anxiety about security there.”

During Xi’s more than decade-long rule, the Chinese government has steered away from its long-held policy of championing ethnic autonomy. Instead, it’s moved toward tighter integration and centralized control of minority groups, drawing a lesson from the Soviet Union’s collapse.

Xi arrived in Lhasa on Wednesday, hours after India and China agreed to explore demarcating their disputed border that runs along Tibet’s southern edge, a key move toward resolving decades-old territorial disputes. The decision came as Chinese Foreign Minister Wang Yi wrapped up a two-day visit to India — his first in three years.

The world’s two most-populous nations have clashed repeatedly over their disputed border in the past 70 years. Ties plunged sharply in 2020 after a deadly confrontation but have recently been on the mend, with efforts gaining urgency amid US President Donald Trump’s tariff policy.

China and India have also split in the past over choosing a successor to the Tibetan Buddhist spiritual leader, who’s been hosted by India after fleeing the region in 1959, nine years after China took control.

While China’s government says it has the right to designate his successor, the Dalai Lama — who turned 90 last month — insists his office would be the sole authority on reincarnation.

The issue is a point of contention between China and India even as they try to repair ties, with Beijing last month lodging a complaint after Prime Minister Narendra Modi sent birthday wishes to the Dalai Lama. India has said it doesn’t interfere in religious matters.

Read more:
China, India Take Steps to Mark Border in Major Reset of TiesModi Hails Closer Ties With China as Trump’s Higher Tariffs LoomXi Ties His Legacy and China’s Economy to $167 Billion DamWhy a Struggle Is Brewing Over Dalai Lama Succession: QuickTake

Beijing has faced criticism for its policies in Tibet. It’s been subject to intense social, security and religious restrictions, much like its northern neighbor Xinjiang. 

Xi’s visit indicates Beijing attaches high importance to the region’s development, according to Xinhua, given the president is personally leading a central government delegation to Tibet for the first time. 

In a speech delivered at the ceremony in Tibet, Wang Huning, China’s No.4 official, called for ensuring border stability in the country’s fight against separatism. Cadres in the region should “strengthen innovative social governance, and form an iron wall for maintaining stability,” he said.

Xi previously made a trip to Tibet in 2021 — more than three decades after Jiang Zemin became the last Chinese leader to visit the region. 

It appears Xi flew directly into Lhasa, a city at an altitude of about 3,650 meters (12,000 feet), without first stopping along the way to acclimatize as he did during his last trip in 2021.

For the Chinese leader, who turned 72 in June, it was a “health flex,” Victor Shih, a professor at the University of California, San Diego, said on X.

As he met with local officials, Xi also called for progress on delivering key infrastructure projects in the region. Chief among these is the massive 1.2 trillion yuan ($167 billion) mega-dam, which is three times the size of the Three Gorges Dam.

The dam could also become a source of tension between China and India, as the river runs through the state of Arunachal Pradesh in northeast India and feeds into the Brahmaputra River, which then flows into Bangladesh. China has said it’s talked with countries downstream about the project.

During Wang’s visit, India reiterated its concern about the dam’s construction, which it said “will have implications for lower riparian states,” and called “for utmost transparency in this regard.”

Major ventures such as the Yarlung Tsangpo hydropower project and the Sichuan-Tibet railway must be advanced with “strength, order and efficiency,” Xinhua cited Xi as saying on Wednesday. 

The Chinese leader also urged Tibet to develop agriculture and clean energy, while promoting the integration of culture and tourism.

“The Chinese fear seems to be about inner Tibetan thinking — a fear that Tibetans are still disloyal in their hearts even after more than 70 years under Chinese rule,” said Barnett, who also headed Columbia University’s Modern Tibetan Studies Program until 2018 and writes extensively about the region.

“Exceptional degrees of pressure and persuasion must have been used by local officials to achieve that display of total unity,” he said. “So the signaling of Xi’s visit so far seems very mixed indeed.”

--With assistance from Colum Murphy and Sudhi Ranjan Sen.

(Updates with analyst comments starting in fifth paragraph.)

More stories like this are available on My Healthty Life

©2025 My Healthty LifeL.P.

A Year at a $25K Wellness Club: What the Elite Know About Health

A Year at a $25K Wellness Club: What the Elite Know About Health

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A New Approach to Wellness

Health is an investment, and at Love.Life, a new wellness center co-founded by former Whole Foods Market CEO John Mackey, it’s a pricy one — between $7,500 and $25,000 per year. When I was invited to check out the facility and get a complimentary health assessment as part of a press visit, I felt like I was getting a taste of how the wealthy do wellness — all without spending a dime.

Love.Life is just one of many wellness-focused facilities popping up around the country, and it comes at a time when preventive care is a major health focus. You’ve probably seen celebrities like Kim Kardashian getting full-body MRIs and other concierge medical services. Data-driven approaches to wellness are all the rage, and places like Love.Life are answering the call.

What $25K Gets You

According to its website, Love.Life’s goal is to “inspire and empower individuals to retake control of their health and achieve transformative, lasting results through evidence-based care and personal accountability.” It boasts a “supportive community and compassionate care team that meets individuals where they are on their personal health journey.”

It’s part concierge doctor, part gym, part spa — designed to be a one-stop shop for meeting your holistic health needs. The space, located in an outdoor mall in El Segundo, Calif., is massive. In addition to its physician facilities, there’s a pickleball court and high-tech strength equipment on the gym floor. There’s also a slew of different longevity treatments for members to use, from red light therapy beds and lymphatic drainage suits to cold plunge tubs and individual infrared saunas. Not a member? There’s also a cafe that’s open to the public and serves up healthy food options. (Vegetarian alternative to bone broth, anyone?)

But forget cafes anyone can enter: I was there to cosplay as someone who could afford to drop thousands a year out of pocket on her health. After all, access to all Love.Life has to offer is expensive. While the fitness and recovery membership ($4,600 per year) offers gym and recovery treatment, it doesn’t come with medical care. The lowest-tiered level for that option — the $7,500 per year Silver membership — comes with credits for the above-mentioned longevity treatments, plus advanced lab panel testing, a DEXA bone density scan, a cardiac screening and a gut and oral microbiome test. Also included are five appointments with a physician per year, access to an accountability coach and a nutritional consultation.

The highest level — the $25,000 platinum membership — tacks on a Prenuvo full-body MRI, a 10-day wear of a glucose monitoring device, 10 practitioner appointments and something called “spiritual health programming,” which involves meeting with a spiritual intelligence coach for an hour to create a growth plan that aligns with your wellness goals. As part of my free visit, I’d have my blood drawn for a complete lab workup, do a DEXA scan and have a longevity assessment on the gym floor with a trainer.

22 Vials of Blood, a DEXA Scan and a Fitness Assessment

Love.Life believes the more you know about your health, the more equipped you are to tackle any challenges associated with it. I, too, love information — and as someone who writes about health and wellness for a living, I have more access to it than some. Earlier this year, I got a full-body MRI through SimonMED, hoping to learn more about what’s going on in my body. (I learned I should get a follow-up head MRI with contrast to follow up on some surprising findings; insurance is still pending.) I also wear an Oura ring and religiously track my steps, sleep and “readiness” via its metrics. Needless to say, I didn’t blink when Love.Life said they’d need 22 vials of my blood for the panel. I’d happily bleed for the sake of better health!

Love.Life’s holistic approach meant a half-day of assessments. First, a phlebotomist drew those 22 vials of blood from me (though lab results would take weeks). The DEXA body composition scan I did gave me more immediate results. Despite prioritizing my spin bike over weight training recently, the scan showed that I hadn’t lost a significant amount of muscle like I’d feared.

I was less thrilled by my lackluster results during the longevity assessment on the gym floor: While I hit the normal markers on almost every assessment (I wanted exceptional, obviously), I totally flubbed the farmer’s carry. Curse you, grip strength.

But the best part of the visit? After my bloodwork was done, I was handed a smoothie (to make sure I didn’t pass out) and sat down with Dr. Jaclyn Tolentino, the lead functional medicine doctor at Love.Life. For more than half an hour, Tolentino and I discussed my health concerns: What were some pressing issues I was facing physically and mentally? How was my nutrition? My sleep? Stress levels? Did I take supplements?

As a fairly healthy person, I didn’t have many issues to bring up, but I did note that I occasionally had headaches from low blood sugar and needed to keep my cholesterol in check, as I have a family history on that front. And I mentioned I was relieved to see my DEXA scan confirmed I was keeping muscle tone, given I had slacked a bit on resistance training lately.

Tolentino listened carefully and suggested how Love.Life might be able to help. Here, you don’t just have a doctor, you have a care team that’s as invested in your health as you are. My bloodwork would be sent to a range of experts who would come up with a holistic plan to address all my health needs. That blood sugar issue? Maybe I could consider trying a glucose monitor. Tolentino added that a personal trainer could help create a realistic, sustainable resistance training plan, which a nutritionist would ensure was properly fueled.

Putting All That Data to Use

When my bloodwork results came back weeks later, I did an hour-long video call with Tolentino to discuss them. Tolentino went through each significant finding and explained, in detail, what it meant. Hormonal levels that appeared elevated, she said, were a result of the birth control pill I’m on and nothing to worry about. My iron levels, however, were something that should be addressed. Tolentino recommended taking a daily supplement and checking these levels again in six months. She noted that a Love.Life nutritionist could also help make sure my diet has enough iron.

All of this is a far cry from how I experienced medicine in the past. I’ve been frustrated with doctor visits that only cover one issue at a time. I could bring up my sore throat during an appointment, but sorry, no mentioning that secondary ear issue without a follow-up visit, thanks to insurance billing issues and doctors on a time crunch. All I hear is: a second copay. Another hour off work. The sense that it might be easier and cheaper not to dive that deep into any health concerns. After all, there’s a reason I haven’t made that follow-up head MRI appointment.

But at Love.Life, I had the luxury of time, and I didn’t have to worry about insurance drama. I didn’t have to choose which medical issue was the most pressing to bring up. I felt heard by Tolentino, and encouraged to share as much as possible. The different parts of our bodies all function together. Shouldn’t they be treated as a whole?

The Catch

Yet it’s impossible to talk about Love.Life without acknowledging the so-called elephant in the room: the cost. Love.Life charges membership fees that are out of range for most Americans. Health care providers who have an hour to listen to your needs? That’s a luxury service.

It’s also worth noting that Love.Life can’t do everything, like, say, do a liver biopsy. Instead, its high cost comes with the pledge that it may (emphasis on may, of course) be able to prevent disease and allow you to live a happier, healthier existence. And while lifestyle interventions are crucial in order to protect against certain diseases — such as diabetes and heart disease — they’re certainly easier to achieve when you have the luxury of a care team at your beck and call.

That said, the information I received from Love.Life did help me make some significant lifestyle changes. I’m now taking an iron supplement, but also being far more diligent about getting iron from nutritional sources, like leafy greens, tofu and nuts. And I’m also back to taking mid-afternoon walks: Tolentino informed me that my vitamin D levels were down a bit, and said that getting some sunshine during that time of day can be a great way to boost them.

Overall, these changes are simple and low-cost — no membership fee required. Still, if I hadn’t gone to Love.Life, I may not have felt compelled to take these health markers quite so seriously. While I won’t be paying for a membership (in this economy?!), I do now feel more confident to tackle these challenges on my own.